Eloping

In October of 2025, my husband and I chose to elope on Safari in South Africa. And that shocked a lot of people.

Growing up, I loved watching Say Yes to the Dress, attending weddings and all things celebrating marriage. In all that time, I never imagined my wedding. I loved all the little details and the meaningful pieces, but as much as folks thought I’d want some big flashy wedding, that’s just never been the case.

I want a marriage more than I want the big expensive party.

So we chose to elope!

I’m still so happy that we chose to make the experience about our love and future together. I was able to enjoy the moments of being a bride thanks to the best family and friends without having the pressure of it all.

Obviously do what works for you, but I wanted to share my tips for eloping if that’s what you choose to do!

1. Understand what type of Elopement you want. Are you both ok just going down to the courthouse? Do you want an adventure? Align ahead of time on what you want and the expectations of that so that you avoid hurt feelings or misunderstanding. We wanted to elope together and do the big adventure with some of the pomp and circumstance but also wanted my family to be included. So we did the legal paperwork in the mountains with my parents and brother a few days before we left for Africa. I wanted to feel like a bride, do the photos, wear the dress, say the vows and he wanted to experience that too - but we didn’t want hundreds of people or to spend thousands of dollars on that.

2. Align on budget. While we didn’t spend on the big wedding, 2 weeks in Africa wasn’t cheap. It was less about the cost of a wedding and more about what that money would be spent on. We wanted to spend on an experience that’s important to us both - travel! So we didn’t spend the equivalent of a wedding, but we didn’t spend on a $35 courthouse moment either. At the end of the day, we aligned on what we felt comfortable spending on and how much.

3. Tune out the noise. Thankfully all the people important to us understood what we were doing. Not only that, they thought “oh duh, this makes sense!” Anyone who wasn’t supportive, we don’t speak to anymore. We are both grown adults and want to be surrounded by people who support our relationship and our dreams. It’s ok to question things, it’s not ok to then hear the healthy why and still pose judgement. Tune out those people in your life.

4. Do the research. Eloping is still something you need to plan. There’s laws first and foremost and those are different all over the world. There’s also a timeline to be mindful of in terms of getting licenses, securing photographers, etc. We did a package at the Safari we were on but it still took a lot of back and forth to get the details nailed down.

5. Enjoy it. My favorite thing about the experience was how many times folks asked how we were so calm. We were calm because we took care of everything important in advance and we prioritized the focus, our marriage. What was there to stress about?

I’m so happy with the experience of eloping. It’s everything I dreamed of and more. And we don’t have bills to worry about paying off from a wedding nor did we have to worry about any big stresses that come along with hosting that type of experience. I married my best friend on a mountain overlooking the African Bush with freaking giraffes and hyenas in the background of our photos. It was truly a dream I’m not sure I’ll ever get over.

Your wedding is your experience. Do what makes you and your partner the happiest and healthiest versions of yourself. It sets up the intention for your marriage and that’s not something to take lightly.

The Perfect Fit

A wise man once told me:

"When you're struggling to fit in, you gotta find the places that feel like home because they're not going to find you."

And I was shook.

We all spend a good amount of time figuring out who we are, what we want to do/be, and where we fit in the world. I've certainly spent my fair share of time finding myself and I probably forever will. I firmly believe that the moment you don't think there's anything to learn about yourself or the world, is the moment you have stopped growing.

To have the journey of life summed up so simply opened my eyes. I often complicate things with anxiety and overthinking. Having an outsider challenge me to think differently often leads me to gain new and beneficial perspective.

Because I'm inherently a planner, I've had this whole life thing on a step by step plan since I was born. I popped out with a to do list. And yet I've spent many nights wondering where I fit in and if what I'm doing is where I'm supposed to be.

What better way to figure those things out than to simply to what I love and do that every day? I like to read. Why am I not engaging with other friends who love to read and talking to them about this passion? I love being active. Why am I not going to the classes I love with the people I love? I'm active in philanthropy. Why am I not volunteering with other friends who are just as active?

It seems daunting to immerse yourself in the passions that fuel you but when you realize you're doing these things anyways, it makes it a hell of a lot easier to see where you can incorporate others and expand those passions. Perhaps even create a lifeblood out of passions you never knew could become so?

We aren't the generation our parents lived in. Nobody is really joining clubs or active in their alumni groups but we are invested in the things these circles represent. The modern day equivalent is trivia night, class pass, food festivals, and tailgates.

When you look around, you're already participating in your passions in some way. But if you're still not living life the way you want to, or concerned you're not fitting into the spaces you're currently living in - re-evaluate what makes you feel alive and do that. Change where you're spending your time and when you seek the things that make you happiest, you will in turn fit in and feel confident in where you belong.

Meditation Monday

Cool, so it's Friday. But Meditation Friday doesn't sound right. I brought you daily mantras last month and this month I'm expanding our hippie lifestyle to include meditation. 

I've always been a skeptic of meditation. I can't sit still longer than 5 minutes without seeing a shiny object and abandoning the stillness for more exciting adventures. 

Recently, I discovered an app called Headspace. It's free for the basic sessions and then you can subscribe to more advanced levels as you progress in your practice. 

Headspace is the first and only experience I've ever had with meditation. This is not an ad, I downloaded the app at the recommendation of a Psychologist that is heavily respected in his field. 

You start out meditating for 3 minutes. And as easy as that sounds, I've got ADHD and anxiety - getting me to focus on nothing for 3 minutes and just feeling my body in its current space - that's damn near impossible. But I challenged myself to commit to 5 days of the introductory course and I did it!

It certainly wasn't easy, but it's definitely been beneficial to me and calming my anxious thoughts before bed. For me, bedtime is where I struggle. It takes me ages to fall asleep and I don't remember the last time I've slept through the night. Taking a few minutes to clear my head before I go to sleep has helped me to have more success in my snoozing habits.

Now I have to be honest, I did fall off the Headspace meditation game for a few weeks while I was abroad. But the cool thing is, it's so easy to catch back up with whenever you are able to make the time. 

I'm a big fan of the specific categories they offer within the app as well. There's sleep, flying, school, work, EVERYTHING that keeps us stressing in the world. 

The best part - it's not a bunch of hippie nonsense that weirds me out. It's simple, straightforward, and just asks you to get in tune with yourself. 

If you're looking for some natural help with anxiety, stress, or fears, download Headpsace and give meditation a try for 5 days. If it doesn't work for you, you've really only wasted a good 15 minutes of your life, and we all know you waste way more time than that tagging friends in memes.