In October of 2025, my husband and I chose to elope on Safari in South Africa. And that shocked a lot of people.
Growing up, I loved watching Say Yes to the Dress, attending weddings and all things celebrating marriage. In all that time, I never imagined my wedding. I loved all the little details and the meaningful pieces, but as much as folks thought I’d want some big flashy wedding, that’s just never been the case.
I want a marriage more than I want the big expensive party.
So we chose to elope!
I’m still so happy that we chose to make the experience about our love and future together. I was able to enjoy the moments of being a bride thanks to the best family and friends without having the pressure of it all.
Obviously do what works for you, but I wanted to share my tips for eloping if that’s what you choose to do!
Understand what type of Elopement you want. Are you both ok just going down to the courthouse? Do you want an adventure? Align ahead of time on what you want and the expectations of that so that you avoid hurt feelings or misunderstanding. We wanted to elope together and do the big adventure with some of the pomp and circumstance but also wanted my family to be included. So we did the legal paperwork in the mountains with my parents and brother a few days before we left for Africa. I wanted to feel like a bride, do the photos, wear the dress, say the vows and he wanted to experience that too - but we didn’t want hundreds of people or to spend thousands of dollars on that.
Align on budget. While we didn’t spend on the big wedding, 2 weeks in Africa wasn’t cheap. It was less about the cost of a wedding and more about what that money would be spent on. We wanted to spend on an experience that’s important to us both - travel! So we didn’t spend the equivalent of a wedding, but we didn’t spend on a $35 courthouse moment either. At the end of the day, we aligned on what we felt comfortable spending on and how much.
Tune out the noise. Thankfully all the people important to us understood what we were doing. Not only that, they thought “oh duh, this makes sense!” Anyone who wasn’t supportive, we don’t speak to anymore. We are both grown adults and want to be surrounded by people who support our relationship and our dreams. It’s ok to question things, it’s not ok to then hear the healthy why and still pose judgement. Tune out those people in your life.
Do the research. Eloping is still something you need to plan. There’s laws first and foremost and those are different all over the world. There’s also a timeline to be mindful of in terms of getting licenses, securing photographers, etc. We did a package at the Safari we were on but it still took a lot of back and forth to get the details nailed down.
Enjoy it. My favorite thing about the experience was how many times folks asked how we were so calm. We were calm because we took care of everything important in advance and we prioritized the focus, our marriage. What was there to stress about?
I’m so happy with the experience of eloping. It’s everything I dreamed of and more. And we don’t have bills to worry about paying off from a wedding nor did we have to worry about any big stresses that come along with hosting that type of experience. I married my best friend on a mountain overlooking the African Bush with freaking giraffes and hyenas in the background of our photos. It was truly a dream I’m not sure I’ll ever get over.
Your wedding is your experience. Do what makes you and your partner the happiest and healthiest versions of yourself. It sets up the intention for your marriage and that’s not something to take lightly.